Friday, November 25, 2022

The pitch to sell manure part 2


“What about that trans Peacock, Kieron?” Bloomy did not try to care, she was in the advertising firm. The worst place hacks like her have to work in. How could you do some direct marketing here without looking like a villain?

The receptionist looked pensive, indecisive. 

"Yeah, call his agent, it'd be like sell it like an opportunity of a lifetime to sell this crud, Tell Emma that it's his calling!"

"Are you sure she's gonna notice?"

"Oh no, just make up a story so that this is new product yeah, one we can relabel as a trendy pre-workout. Then we can add a some blends here, and it'd be the new gunk Gym junkies can place into their smoothies!"

The copywriter took heed.

"Yeah, they said this blend had to sell. So here we are, selling the biggest pile of dung that has come to our house, but we must make the cogs of the industry turn by pleasing the worst clients in the history of our faekind, just to make a dirty buck. We have to do it, or somebody else will. To barely get by."

"Could be worse." Remarked the copywriter.

She turned, ranting off like she was going to quit her job, but she didn't.